When Legway (icon for NUEDEXTA) was first drawn with useless wooden egg legs, she found it rather amusing and even had a few uncontrolled bursts of laughter over it, or as psychiatrists like to say “an episode of pseudobulbar affect (PBA).”
But now that she’s had a chance to try out her new egg legs, she doesn’t think it’s the least bit funny and is suing the maker of the drug she was created to represent as well as the American Psychiatric Association for voting a fraudulent psychiatric disorder into existence in the first place (PBA).
Lillian, a frumpy, overweight woman always seen in a brown cardigan sweater, shapeless polyester pants and an un-stylish hairstyle has filed a $20 million lawsuit against Avinir, makers of NUEDEXTA® for knowingly and willfully creating her with useless wooden egg legs. She has named the American Psychiatric Association in a separate fraud claim and is seeking $40 million in that action.
“What am I supposed to do with useless wooden egg legs? I can’t kneel down, drive, ski, tap-dance, go for long walks on the beach, jump rope or wear high heels. Not to mention the fact that my mobility around the house is very limited. When I want to move I have to rock myself back and forth and kind of scooch forward. It gets very tiresome and puts a strain on my back. You’d think they could have had the decency to equip me with rollers or wheels or something. At least then I could have gone around the block and maybe even gotten a job as one of those meter maids on wheels or something.”
Legway was given the courage to file her lawsuit after talking with several of the wind-up PRISTIQ ladies who were drawn with wrong, mitten-like hands by Phizer Pharmaceuticals. See PRISTIQ stories here.
According to product information found at nuedextza.com, “NUEDEXTA® (dextromethorphan hydrobromide and quinidine sulfate) capsules are approved for the treatment of pseudobulbar affect (PBA). PBA is a medical condition that can occur in patients with certain underlying neurologic conditions and causes involuntary, sudden, and frequent episodes of laughing and/or crying.”
A spokesperson for Avinir, said Legway’s lawsuit is frivolous and without merit. “She’s basically a whiner with PBA. We never know from one minute to the next if she’s going to laugh or cry. Oh, and by the way, make sure you don’t link people over to our website from here. We’ve got a website inking policy that prohibits anyone from making us look bad. If you don’t have anything good to say about us, don’t say anything at all. Okay, pal? And tell your editor over there at Psych-Tmes she better watch her ass. We don’t think she’s funny.”DISCLAIMER: This blog is fictional parody written by a real estate nut who makes things up and writes them down. Don't believe a word she says.